By Dom Cioffi
Do you remember early in the pandemic, when the high school seniors were about to graduate and everyone was lamenting how sad it was for that age group? We all agreed that it didn’t seem fair that they had to miss such an important rite of passage, along with the requisite dances, parties, and other celebrations.
I remember thinking that my son was lucky because he was still a few years away from graduation, so it wouldn’t affect his class. In fact, we were all confident the Covid craziness would be a distant memory in a matter of months.
However, the pandemic has lasted two years and anyone who has lived with a teenaged child during that time would likely agree that it has not been healthy for them both physically and mentally. (It hasn’t been healthy for any age group, but that’s another story.)
If you had told me in March of 2020 that I would spend the next two years working from home, I would have smiled at the idea. No more commute, office politics, or people stealing my food out of the communal kitchen – awesome!
But the reality has been radically different.
Honestly, my son has been a trooper throughout the past 24 months, but it’s affected him adversely in ways he doesn’t even realize.
First of all, my son is a social animal; he thrives off the energy of other kids. Yes, this makes concentrating at school a bit of an issue, but he is well liked by students and teachers because he’s so much fun to have around. Not being around his friends and classmates left him without his main energy outlet, which resulted in a very distracted child.
Consequently, at-home learning turned into a train wreck for him. My wife and I quickly figured out that leaving our son unattended on a computer for six hours a day was like locking a kid in a candy store and then telling him to eat a salad.
But the worst part about the pandemic has been his age group’s inability to physically socialize with the opposite sex. At 16 years old, he and his friends should have been going to dances and out on their first dates. They should have been hanging out at the mall and going to the movies together. They should have been passing through the normal courting rituals that teenagers attended to for millennia.
Unfortunately, none of that happened.
Instead, they all went to Snapchat and socialized with a digital barrier between them. And as far as I can tell, that digital barrier has stunted normal teenaged interactions.
My son has claimed to have no less than 10 girlfriends over the past two years, but he’s never physically met any of them. I had to inform him that no one can register as your girlfriend unless you’ve met them in the “real” world.
He disagreed.
Every time I see that he’s chatting up a new girl, my first question is always, “Does she live in this state?” Nine out of 10 times, they don’t. So that’s when I inquire how he planned to see them, after which he scoffs at me like I have no idea what it’s like to date in the “real” world.
I won’t get into how the kids have managed to work around the limitations of not seeing each other physically, but let’s just say the long-term effects can’t be positive.
Now that things are getting back to normal (until the next strain hits), my son and his friends are doing more things that teenagers should be doing, but he’s still been relying on the digital relationships instead of embarking on a real one.
Last week, however, my son went to the bowling alley with some of his buddies and when he returned home, he proudly announced that he met a girl and got her phone number.
I jokingly said, “A real girl? Are you sure it wasn’t her avatar?” (That statement was met with a very stern, disavowing look.)
And then this past weekend, the young woman came over to visit — a real physical girl in our house! I can’t tell you how happy my wife and I were, especially when she conversed with us in such a happy and engaging manner.
I guess there is hope.
This week’s feature, “Book of Love,” also focuses on a burgeoning relationship, except in this case it’s between two writers who find themselves wildly successful for different reasons.
Set in Mexico and revolving around the publication of a steamy romance novel, “Book of Love” weaves an semi-interesting (albeit predictable) tale of affection and self-discovery.
Check this one out if you’re a fan of the rom-com genre. It has its comedic moments and is well structured, but overall, the film bares no surprises.
A sappy “C+” for “Book of Love,” now available for streaming on Amazon Prime.
Got a question or comment for Dom? You can email him at [email protected].
