My first spring in Killington, 2023, I started dating a friend who lived locally. They had introduced me to the community a few years earlier and helped me connect with so many awesome folks, opening the door to a lot of opportunities for me. I felt so welcomed by her energy.
As a local for a few years prior to my arrival, I was invited into her group as her “Plus 1.” Finally, I thought I had a start at some close friendships and a support system beyond myself. Despite some hiccups early on, this was becoming the best year.
As the summer progressed, it felt like almost every weekend was a new adventure around the region. Visiting friends and family with the pup (who I probably have more awesome photos of than my concert friends), exploring great trails with so many waterfalls, and really getting into the thick of the area.
Things seemed to culminate in June after a particularly enjoyable music festival in New Hampshire. We volunteered and got to meet some awesome musicians from around the region. It was a great experience, though a little wet — A lot of our trips and events seemed to be getting met with rain.
In July of 2023 Vermont, New York and other states in the Northeast were hit with tremendous rainfall. Roads crumbled into nothing as they became completely washed out. Businesses were destroyed, homes and properties left in pieces, massive power outages and the overall sacrifice of one of Vermonts most beautiful and reliable summer months. Towns like St. J, Montpelier, Ludlow, Londonderry, Barre, Stockbridge and even Killington saw destruction that everyone thought had ended with Irene.
Once again, the people banded together to bail each other out. Vermont-based band Phish raised $3.5 million for flood relief with a pair of shows in late August. People put differences aside and showed up for each other without hesitation. It was a terrible tragedy that brought the best out of so many of us.
One day, when things settled down a little bit, I was invited to a great gathering of folks at The Clear for a big family dinner. It can be tricky to get so many folks in the same room when schedules are so hectic. During a time where I was working hard to establish myself in the community and make my own friends, this was special to me. I was incredibly grateful that my partner had included me in so many things like this.
I took one sip of my drink as the last friend sat down. My partner got a phone call and got up abruptly from the table. Considering how many of her friends were right with us, I was immediately concerned. As she rushed back to the table I could see that there was an emergency. We were leaving immediately. There had been an accident with her parents.
That moment and the next 48 hours were a blur. Seeing her family, who were always very sweet to me, come together was very powerful. Knowing there was nothing any of us could do, but be there for each other, we stayed. Unfortunately, we lost them.
The next few weeks were tough. Suddenly, she had so much on her plate and all of it was difficult. Seeing so much of the community come together during this time for her was incredible. It was a true testament to how well Vermonters take care of each other in times of need. I did what I could to help with arrangements, planning and basic needs like pet care and meals. We wrote a touching bit of poetry for her parents and talked about songs to play. This was a different level of closeness that I’d never experienced.
So many people turned up for the funeral and celebration of life. Many locals drove the two and a half hours up to the White Mountains. The legacy left by these two high-school sweethearts, turned guardians of the community, was apparent.
The time that followed, through the rest of the year, had some great moments. I was able to introduce my partner to my friends and family in Ohio. She showed me some of the cool spooky fall things, like a trip to Salem and cool haunted houses. There were extra cute Willy Wonka themed dog costumes happening and a Halloween concert in Burlington. There were some nice foliage and waterfall hikes ending with delicious beverages.
Things were good, but we had begun to forcefully grow apart.
As the cold weather started to approach, I had considered how we would spend the holidays. Our shared focus on family led us to a loose agreement to split those times in the past. I won’t forget the great Christmas in 2021 with her folks and the subsequent party. But this year was different. My deep, sensitive, expressive side was not meshing with her tendency to be more guarded and paired with the recent tragedy, we were both starved for intimacy. She decided to spend Thanksgiving away from me, so I went to visit family. I’d hoped this would help her in her healing process.
When Christmas came around, I was desperately looking for some close time with her, as she was the center of my Vermont family, but she had decided to go to Costa Rica on a volunteer trip. Wanting to do what I could to honor her fierce independence, without sacrificing too many of my own needs, and hoping to offer any opportunity to enable some healing, I encouraged her to go. I spent time with friends and hung around the Access Road.
By the time she returned to Vermont, I knew something had changed. She no longer knew herself, and I did not know her any longer. This distance that had been building wasn’t going to improve, it was just going to amplify. After much discussion, we decided to part ways.
A year that started with such intensity and a struggle to find my footing, ended with one of the greatest connections of my life slowly crumbling until finally being put out of its misery. We ended the year with some good music and started to move on.
As we moved into 2024, I promised myself that this would be the year I chased my dreams. This would be the year it all came together. This would be the year I began to paint my masterpiece.
Next week, look for Part 3 of this story: “Here Comes Sunshine.”
